because I'm guilty. And I really don't know how to share the last few days
Almost feel like I've committed a crime. However, have done no such thing…
have only committed myself….to the man again.
Yes, Yes… I know you've been sick of me, my ranting and have generally given
me all the support I need to get a handle on things… and I've gone and done
the complete opposite of that.
But who really knows what material we're actually made up of?
And now that I've broken the news to you… can I take a breather and say
Giving you the gossip, here's the love story in brief:
We speak on the phone… discussing the blank calls etc… ( I knew it was
him)….have this extremely formal/ polite conversation etc, for almost 2
However, the ice is melting and playful taunts are exchanged, a smile in the
voice, an eagerness to prolong the conversation, an itch to keep calling/
messaging… just be in touch.
And ofcourse, all this while I'm floating a level above the ground and
telling myself to come back to reality! " Be stern" "Be firm" " you need to
be with someone who takes a stand for you" … well although the words keep
repeating in my head, my heart says " I'm longing to see him" " I'm longing
to lay my hands on him" " I'm longing to tell him I miss him"
So I finally meet him. It's supposed to be a serious exchange, sitting
across the table over coffee. Talking about us. I'm prepared.
I open the door. I see him.
We hug. For a long time.
N then I kiss him… just like that. No words exchanged… just like that…All my
freaking resolutions flying out of the window.
And as they say…The rest is history.
p.s. Of course, the serious conversation happened, in between a lot of
tongue twisting.( and I'm not really sure I regret it happening that way!)